Dreams and ambitions...

I was traveling by PTC bus to college. I was sitting in the last row. A couple with two small children - the elder one about ten years old and the younger one around six years old.- boarded the bus in guindy. They sat next to me. The youngest kid nearest to me.

So the bus rolled on. The kids were pretty naughty. The youngest kid tried grabbing my spectacles, but I moved away in time.

The airport is on the way to college. We were near the airport. I could see the runway, and a few planes parked in the hangar. Suddenly the youngest kid next to me started screaming “Appa!! Airplane paaru!! Airplane paaru!!” And I saw his face. The airplanes came into full view. His eyes widened. His face was filled with awe. His mouth dropped open. I could see the airplanes in his clear jet black eyes. He kept looking at them till they were out of sight.

I smiled at him. He smiled back. It was a cute kiddish grin that he gave me. He reminded me of someone…. Who is it… whom did he remind me of??? I was thinking. And it struck me. He reminded me of… well... me. Yeaa... he reminds me of me. I look at airplanes with the same awe and fascination too. Even today I look at planes awestruck. But the only difference today is that, whenever I look at planes, there is an element of dejection, a bit of hatred towards this education, a bit of frustration, that goes along with the awestruck feeling.

The craze for airplanes I had developed when I was a child led me to believe that I will become a pilot or an aeronautical engineer one day. It was not ambition. It was more than that, it was obsession.

I got 97% in my high school examinations. I was so happy and thought my dream to study aeronautical engineering was going to come true. So I went to this college’s office. Lets call it H college, to enquire about the seats (that was the only college other than madras institute of technology that had aeronautical engineering). So they ushered my mom and me into a hall where there were many students and parents anxiously enquiring about admission. We sat in front of one of the officers. She was kind and smiled a lot. We asked her about the admissions to aeronautical engineering. I still remember what she said “Sorry ma’am all the seats are sold “

I was totally frustrated. They ‘sold’ all seats. Each seat at a price of 4 lacs!!! No value for my marks, no value for the kinda person I am. Its all jus how much money you can give! Then why the hell did I work so hard to get 97%?

Now I am in a college doing a course I never even thought I would be doing. And this seat too, I had to pay rs.65000 to ‘buy’ it. And what hurts me most is, even a fellow who has got 70% has paid rs.65000 to sit in my class. THEN WHAT VALUE DOES MY 97% HOLD???!!!
The bus suddenly came to a halt, and the family next to me was going to get down. I looked at that little kid. Maybe he might wanna become a pilot one day, or maybe an aeronautical engineer. All I got to tell him is “either you must have lots of money, or get out of this country and pursue your dreams elsewhere”.

The kid waved at me. I waved back...... and the bus moved on……